‘Conservation Island’ in Second Life – Computing – Personal Tech – Indiatimes Infotech

This is so goddamned retarded.

These days you will hear the term “metaverse” thrown about like an overheated potato passed round a crowd of children. It loosely describes the “other world” of online entities like Second Life (see above article) – the idea being that this world somehow exists separately from that world.

And now, thanks to the WWF (who are usually a bit better than this) you can log on to 2Life, and go off and “stroke” a “panda” on “Conservation” “Island” in the hope that “it” will better this world’s attitudes towards conservation.

Except it does the opposite. Think about it – Second Life is NOT another world, it’s a bunch of pictures and animations hosted on a computer that uses electricity. In fact, last year Linden Labs the creators, announced that an avatar in Second Life uses the same amount of electricity as a real-life Mexican person. Sounds like a pretty unethical platform for anything environmental already doesn’t it.

So let’s follow through the logic these guys have in mind. Please welcome my “virtual handpuppet avatar that DOESN’T exist and is not to be credited with parallel universe criteria”, Timmy.

(Applause for Timmy. I said applause. At your desk. Go on. In real life in front of everyonre. Right now dammit.)

Timmy Conservationist: “Ooh, I care about the environment, I think this virtual island is a great idea, I’m going to log on and visit it. Maybe I can pet an Urangutan LIKE IN REAL LIFE.”

Me (angry, with a stick in my hand:) Well, I think that you should plug some equipment into the wall, maybe a fridge, fire it up, open the door and just leave it there. How would that sound?”

Timmy Conservationist: “No, that sounds awful. How selfish and awful that would be. Think of the pandas.”

Me (Stick at the ready:) Well, maybe it would be better to leave all the lights on for a couple of years, that will cure the world’s ills. Hurray for carbon!

Timmy Conservationist: “I don’t think you really get the idea.”

Me (Bloody massive Stick) “No, YOU don’t get it. All you do when you pop off to Conservation Island is turn on a bunch of electricity swallowing machinery in some twice-removed meta-effort to register your “concern” for wildlife you’ve bothered not even to visit in a zoo. Tool Bar!”

Timmy Conservationist (Spluttering like a twat:) “Well, at least it raises awareness about the environment.”

Me (Smashing Stick into hand-puppet, and therefore own hand, demonstrating ironically the self-defeating cyclical nature of the Conservation Island argument, thanks I just thought of it then, good isn’t it:) No, actually it makes reinforces people’s belief that overuse of electronics and natural resources for altogether frivolous and token-like gestures is justified and not part of the problem.”

In fact would be the same use as having an Anti-Violence Bar Fight Night, where the winner gets to press the button that nukes North Korea whilst projecting a big middle finger in the sky like a rude Batman Sign at the world.

It’s like sticking an Anti-Iraq war ribbon on your gas-guzzler car.

It’s like spelling “I hate Violence” in fist imprints on a Hobo’s back.

It’s wrong.

Unplug the internet.

Ok maybe not completely.


Please don’t point out the irony of me using the internet to denounce a waste of resources like overuse of the internet. I know this was a massive waste. I get it, I’m the playground bully who signs the petition, but how about voting with your feet and leaving Second Life and looking at ways to reduce, reuse and recycle. And REALLY making a difference can be as simple as that.

Then hopefully one day you won’t HAVE to stroke an electric panda. When the real ones have died.

Of Second Life poisoning.

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