Ananova – ‘Surgeon stole my bum’

Wow – what must it feel like to have half a bum? I guess you can save 50% on chairs, ride a very odd kind of side-saddle – but then again you wouldn’t be able to turn the other cheek would you? Would that make you an intolerant person?

Still, will plastic surgery nutjobs ever learn? “Ooh, I wnat my forehead moulded so it looks like 3 confused goldfish, it’s all the rage in Pakistan.” Moron.

Personally I think plastic surgery is bad enough – as below:

as_roupas_do_michael_jackson.jpg

but when human error is added to the list of disfiguring possibilities, and you’r limping away with half chair-cushion – man I am far away from the knife as possible. I mean, I know what I’m like cracking an egg, it’s not a pretty sight. If chickens know my abilities, they would be coming to me to hand-rear their chicklets. I don’t want a shaky-handed clown playing Mr Potato Head with my jacksie, thanks very much.
See what I mean?

No? Then get your eyes enhanced.

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